If NFL Players Had Walk-on Songs

With the National Football League’s preseason well underway — and NFL tickets flying off the digital shelves at ScoreBig — fans are starting to get the jitters for the real-deal Holyfield. You know, when games actually count and you’re sitting in the stadium watching your team with a cold beer (or two).

We have to admit: ScoreBig is just as stoked as you are for the start of the season. To have some fun of our own, we’ve created this top 7 list of hypothetical NFL player walk-on songs — you know, like when Enter Sandman played while New York Yankees’ closer Mariano Rivera used to trot out to the mound. (You’ll have to use your imagination a bit here, because, well, if every NFL player had a walk-on song playing every time he entered a game, the stadium soundtrack would be a bit eclectic).

7. Adrian Peterson – Running Back – Minnesota Vikings

Considering how much time this guy has spent in the end zone over the years — and the 10,000+ rushing yards he’s put up — we’re going to venture a guess that Minnesota Vikings’ running back Adrian Peterson’s walk-on song would be “Back That Thing Up” by Juvenile. Mainly as an added directive to all the defenders who try (and fail) to stop him on his speedy way to glory.

6. Tom Brady – Quarterback – New England Patriots

No offense to Pats fans, but Tom Brady is no spring chicken. At 37, he’s one of the elder statesman of the NFL. But don’t let that fool you. He’s a 3-time Super Bowl champ (and 2-time SB MVP) and is married to one of the hottest women on earth, model Gisele Bündchen. So to pay tribute to him, we’ve picked Neil Young’s “Old Man” — a rock classic that keeps getting better as time goes on.

5. Jadeveon Clowney – Linebacker – Houston Texans (rookie)

Rookie linebacker Jadeveon Clowney — like all the first-year players in the league — has got a lot to prove. But we’re bullish on him and expect big things from the collegiate sack machine. He’s going to be an NFL-ticket-selling machine. Mark our words. So we’re going to go with Pro-Pain’s “Put the Lights Out” as his roaring walk-on song. Featuring Ice-T trading lines with this heavy metal powerhouse, this will basically tell opposing quarterbacks what’s going to happen in the few seconds after Clowney bears down on them.

4. Ben Roethlisberger – Quarterback – Pittsburgh Steelers

“Big Ben” Roethlisberger, play-caller for the Pittsburgh Steelers, is well known for zigzagging around defenders and playing through pain, his nerves of steel a testament to why only a few guys out there can be pro quarterbacks and the rest of us scream bloody murder when we get a papercut. So, of course, Ben’s walk-on song will be “Superman’s Dead” by Canadian band Our Lady Peace. Because the only guy who could kill the Man of Steel himself is that mensch from Steel-town.

3. Sammy Watkins – Wide Receiver – Buffalo Bills (rookie)

Buffalo Bills fans finally have a player to get excited about — and a way to sell more NFL tickets. Wide receiver Sammy Watkins has been tearing it up in practice, and everybody’s chomping at the bit, hoping that this kid will bring glory back to the soon-to-be-frozen tundra that is upstate New York. So for Sammy, we’ve picked the Byrds’ “Eight Miles High,” because Northern New York radio stations play pretty much nothing but the classic stuff on permanent loop. And well, what could be a better way to describe where Watkins’ is going to have to go to catch some of those passes this year?

2. Drew Brees – Quarterback – New Orleans Saints

At 35, Drew Brees — like Tom Brady — is another old man as far as NFL quarterbacks go. But the 2010 Super Bowl champ and 8-time Pro Bowler has yet another solid chance to lead his team to the Big Game this year, and counting him out would be simply criminal. So he’ll be coming in and out of the game to Alien Ant Farm’s deft cover of Michael Jackson classic “Smooth Criminal.” (R-rated dancing, pointing finger to sky, and yelling “WOO!” not included.)

1. Johnny Manziel – Quarterback – Cleveland Browns

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with dreaming — and a lot of NFL critics did that in advance of the draft, during which upstate quarterback Johnny Manziel saw his draft value dip down like a fat man on the other side of Kate Moss’ backyard see-saw. As much as we’d love to see the Browns actually contend this year, it’s likely not going to happen courtesy of the cocky, untested Manziel — who grizzled veteran sack-masters will look at and see a delicious medium-rare steak. So his walk-on song, whenever he does get the call this season, will be Aerosmith’s “Dream On.” Pretty easy to figure out why.

By Will Levith for the ScoreBlog

Feature image credit: Erik Daniel Drost

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